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Room 101: Paul Privey – Rosslyn Park lock

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1. Economy class flights

I’m 6ft 5ins and the seats in economy class are never big enough and it costs too much to upgrade. If I sweet talk the air hostess, it’s sometimes possible to get moved but normally I have to grin and bear it. Once, on a flight to Tenerife, I had to be pushed down into the seat. I didn’t last long though; the pain was just too much and they managed to get a seat with more room up near the kitchen.

TRP verdict: You’ve got yourself in on a wing and a prayer.

2. Batman eyebrows

Most women seem to have the most exaggerated of eyebrows nowadays, I liken them to Adam West’s when he played Batman. Done badly, they can look like a pair of slugs on a forehead.

TRP verdict: Plucking hell Paul, you’re not brow beaten on this occasion.

3. Little trophy dogs

For me, as a northerner, dogs should have a proper purpose – like helping to give you exercise when you take them for a walk or to help on a farm, for example – not carried around in a Gucci bag like I saw a bloke do the other day in a shopping centre near Bicester Village.

TRP verdict: Go on, we’ll let this one through … just to make you yappy.

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