My Life in Rugby: Joe Makysymiw – The brilliant, emotional world of French rugby

Former Leicester Tigers, Connacht, Dragons and Agen second row, Joe Makysymiw, reflects on his life in rugby.

I realised pretty quickly in France that passion can be a double-edged sword.

I had just arrived at Agen with absolutely no French – not even GCSE level – when we were in a team meeting and my name kept getting shouted.

The coach was banging the board, my name was ringing around the room and I was sat there thinking, “here we go, I am getting properly bigged up here”.

I had a bit of a smile on my face, nodding along, assuming they were saying how well I had started, how great it was to have me over.

Emotional, loud, unforgiving

After a few minutes of this I tapped one of the South African lads who had been there for eight years and asked, “What’s he saying?”

“You’re getting an absolute bollocking, mate.”

I’d spent the whole meeting thinking I was being praised when in reality I was being torn into.

That summed up French rugby for me: emotional, loud, unforgiving – but also brilliant.

I did not grow up dreaming of being a I professional player. Football was my first sport but I got worse as everyone else got better.

I was tall, awkward and people kept telling me to give rugby a go. When my friends moved across, I followed them and played my first club game at 15.

I was late to it and, to be honest, I was not very good. Leicester Tigers came onto the scene almost by accident.

We played an academy warm-up game and afterwards someone came over and said: “You’re two metres tall and you work hard – you can come in, but you’ve got a lot to work on.”

They certainly were not there for my skillset or my passing.

Honesty and standards

Tigers’ academy was hard. But it taught you about work, honesty and standards. I came through with lads like Will Evans, Harry Thacker and Fraser Balmain.

Later on there were boys like Ben White and Tommy Ref-fell. It has been class over the years to see them in the Premiership, URC or Champions Cup and think, “I remember you as skinny kids getting flogged at Oval Park”.

My Leicester debut is still one of my favourite nights in rugby – even though my parents missed it.

It was against the Barbarians at Welford Road in November 2014. I was not expecting to play, so I told mum and dad not to bother coming up.

I thought I would be 24th man, hold a few tackle bags and head home. Then I found myself on the bench against a ridiculous Baa-Baas side – the Honey Badger (Nick Cummins), Matt Stevens, Stephen Luatua and other stars.

When I came on, my parents started receiving texts from friends all over Leicester saying: “Your son’s just made his debut!”

They could not believe that I had told them to stay at home!

It was a sell-out, we were in special poppy shirts that we got to keep and the whole occasion felt huge.

That night still sits right near the top of my career memories.

On the run: Joe Maksymiw playing for Leicester Tigers in the Premiership, 2017

PICTURE: Getty Images

Fresh start

I played Anglo-Welsh, but only a couple of Premiership and Champions Cup games for Tigers, I never established myself there.

I was in and around it without ever really grabbing a shirt. That changed when I went to Connacht – I probably played my best rugby there.

The move out to Galway gave me a fresh start. Working with people like Andy Friend and Jimmy Duffy, and being part of such a tight group, suited me.

It is a small place, so the team genuinely becomes your social circle – coffees together, lunches together, long bus trips together.

It was also my first crack at the PRO14. The travelling, especially when South Africa trips came in, felt so new at the time.

You spend hours on planes and buses but that is where a lot of the memories are made.

Special

On the field, a couple of things stand out. Beating Montpellier at home in the Champions Cup was massive – a proper statement win.

All the inter-pros were special, but starting against Leinster in a sell-out Sportsground a year after I had been starting in the Anglo-Welsh Cup for Leicester really hit home how far I had come.

The Covid-cut season is still a frustration. I think I had played 15 games on the bounce and was really in a groove when everything stopped.

That side of it – the unfinished business – is something a lot of players from that time carry.

Leaving Connacht for Dragons was driven by life as much as rugby.

I had some family stuff going on and wanted to be back in the UK. There was also a part of me that thought I might be able to push for Wales if things went well.

Dragons had just made the Champions Cup and looked to be on the up, so it felt like a good fit.

Rugby-wise it was a tough period. Covid restrictions, results not going our way, long spells without wins – it was not the easiest environment.

Highlight

The clear highlight was going back to Connacht, starting and getting a win against my old club.

That felt pretty sweet. The problem was we then lost what felt like the next ten games, so the high did not last long.

When my time at Dragons ended I honestly thought that might be it. There was nothing concrete on the table and retirement was definitely in my mind.

Then France came calling in very French fashion. We had finished the season and, like every club, had a few drinks!

I had no contract, no idea what was next. I woke up the next morning horribly hungover with two missed calls from my agent.

When I rang him back, he said: “You have two offers in France. Where do you want to go?”

I was in no headspace to be making life decisions, so I asked for a few hours to think. But that is France – things happen late, quickly and with very little warning.

Wild and wonderful

One of the second rows at Agen had moved to Castres, they needed a replacement and I fitted the bill.

Those two years at Agen were wild and wonderful in equal measure. The fans in south-west France are absolutely mad for rugby.

They live it. Opening the new stand at our stadium is one of my favourite days.

We had bespoke shirts for the occasion, the whole town was bouncing and, by chance, 20 of my mates had chosen that weekend to come out for my birthday.

Away wins are like gold dust in France. When we won at Vannes, no one expected it.

We stopped the bus on the way home, piled into a bar for a three-hour celebration and then somehow herded everyone back on board.

Experience

The mindset around home games is completely different to anywhere else I have played. Protecting your fortress is everything.

We made it a big focus to stop losing at home, but French rugby will always find a way to surprise you.

On the night before the Christmas break we played our local rivals, Montauban, who are now in the Top 14, and lost to a last-minute drop-goal.

It broke the camel’s back and our coach resigned immediately afterwards. That is how emotionally charged it all is.

After two seasons I had a decision to make. My girlfriend had been with me in France but, because of Brexit, she could not really work and eventually had to move back.

I loved the experience and the club, but with Agen not gaining promotion in my two years there and no Top 14 offers on the table, I felt like it was time to hang up the boots and head back to the UK.

Disciplined

Now I work for 3Pillars, a sports-based mentoring charity in prisons, and rugby has followed me inside the walls.

We use rugby as a vehicle to work on behaviour, discipline and community with men inside.

Only a couple of the lads I work with have ever played before, so you are starting from scratch, but the values translate quickly.

Just the other day we ran a tournament in a prison that the London team and I had organised.

We had 14 volunteers from local rugby clubs come in to play against our programme participants. It was brilliant to watch.

Men from completely different walks of life treated exactly the same on a pitch, showing respect, integrity and controlled aggression.

A big part of what we do is show that you can still be physical and aggressive, but in a disciplined way that helps rather than harms you – and then take that mindset into other parts of their lives.

I am only a few months into the role, but already you can see how sport builds community and gives people something positive to belong to.

– as told to Ben Jaycock