Room 101: Ryan Lamb – The Worcester fly-half takes us through his prime annoyances

1. New housing estates – The family and I have recently moved into a property on a new housing estate in Cheltenham. It was all a bit of a rush and we only had three days to find somewhere after relocating from Leicester.
With hindsight I’d have probably chosen somewhere else. The house is fine, it’s just where it is I don’t like. All the houses look the same and people can see into one another’s gardens; there’s no privacy whatsoever.
To make matters worse there is never anywhere to park, the developers have tried to cram too much into too small a space whilst ignoring the fact that two-car households are the norm nowadays. You can’t even get a mobile phone signal in the kitchen. That kills me.
TRP verdict: That’s right up our street. You’re in.
2. ‘Faffers’ – It takes me 5-10 minutes to get ready but I seem to be exception to the rule. So many of my fellow backs ‘faff’ about, taking ages to do simple things like getting in and out of a car or obsessing about whether their hair is perfectly in place.
Adam Thompson (Leicester) and Ben Foden (Northampton) are unbelievable in the ‘faffing’ stakes. Those two and Dom Waldouck (Saints) are probably the worst culprits. They have to be seen to be believed. My Mrs is horrendous too, she takes 45 minutes just to put a dress on.
TRP verdict: Without any further delay get yourself in Room 101.
3. Reality TV programmes – TOWIE and Made in Chelsea, and all those types of programmes, just make thick people famous. Everything on television nowadays is reality TV, stick a camera in someone’s face and you can guarantee someone else will watch it. Gogglebox is a good example of that. I fail to understand why anyone would want to watch other people watching TV. It’s unbelievable. Film documentaries are more my cup of tea.
TRP verdict: It’s a (celebrity) jungle out there.  You’re in again.
*This article was published in The Rugby Paper on July 20