Room 101: Nick Easter – Harlequins No.8

Nick Easter1.Golf Etiquette

There are still too many stuffy golf clubs whose committee men worry more about what people wear than their conduct out on the course, which has a much bigger effect on everyone. I’d rather be playing behind someone who repaired their pitch marks and was aware of the need to avoid slow play than someone who takes an age for every shot and takes lumps out of the fairway but has the right type of collared shirt and tailored shorts. Usually the people who bang on about attire etc. are the older members who need to get a bit more authority back in their lives and score little victories for their sad little lives.

TRP verdict: For pleat’s sake, these people need to get a life. You’re in

2.Petrol stations cum supermarkets

I hanker for a return to the days when a petrol station was somewhere where you’d go just to fill up your car with fuel and maybe buy a packet of chewing gum or an air freshener. Nowadays, too many of them are offshoots of big supermarkets and you get people in there doing nigh on a full shop, which just makes for longer queues.

TRP verdict: This should be good fuel for a hot debate. You’re in again

3.Fellow dog walkers

I’ve got a Rottweiler called Duke who is the friendliest Rottweiler ever. He is as soft as a pillow and has never got in a fight or bitten anyone. If he gets too playful around another dog, I quickly nip it in the bud. Fifty per cent of the time I’ll get fellow dog walkers asking me if he is friendly. That really winds me up. I point out that if he wasn’t well-behaved he’d be on a lead. It’s got to the stage now where I respond with really sarcastic remarks, saying things like, “No, he is going to bite your leg off because his jaws are so powerful”. I also get annoyed when people pick up their dogs and hurry away when Duke is nearby. All you are achieving by doing that is instilling the same fear the owner has into the dog and that dog will never be the social animal that they are supposed to be.

TRP verdict: Time for a hang dog expression, as I’m afraid you’ve been rejected.

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