Wayne Barnes believes that ignoring social media is the best way for referees to operate, but is also concerned that online abuse is affecting the number of people willing to referee at all levels.
Barnes took charge of last week's Premiership semi-final between Sale and Leicester, will take charge of Friday night's European Challenge Cup Final between Toulon and Glasgow Warriors, and will officiate at his fifth Rugby World Cup later on this year.
And it is that wealth of experience that has informed his belief that the advice of a close circle of critics, rather than social media, is how he can be assured of having put in a good performance, or learn about aspects of his refereeing he needs to improve.
“If no-one's talking about us afterwards, we've probably done a decent job,” he said, speaking on The Rugby Paper Podcast. “The one thing I've realised over the last 20 years of doing this job in the Premiership, particularly with social media becoming more apparent, you're never going to please everyone.
“I've got people I trust who will hold me to account, not just former referees like Chris White, but ex-international coaches, and if they think it's a decent performance, that's what matters to me.
“Lots of people think they can tell everyone how they can do their job now but my advice would be: get the people you trust around you, trust in their opinion, and when they're telling you to improve, that's who you listen to.
“But equally, if you don't search social media when you've had an off game, you shouldn't be when you've had a good game!”
With the prominence of social media however, and the number of big debates that have centred around referees' performances, Barnes understands that it does still play a role.
And he worries that it is detracting from the better aspects of the role, putting off people from refereeing at a grassroots level that has a chronic shortage of referees.
“When you start attacking an individual, and them as a person,” he added. “That very easily becomes a pile on.
“This is a hard enough job to do without everyone else telling you what a bad person you are and what they want to do to you.
“And we want to attract people, because my team down in Bream, their seconds and thirds struggle to get a referee. We need people to start refereeing.
“So let's talk about what's great about officiating. It's about the camaraderie, keeping your boots on, still running around when your body's falling apart, and sharing a pint with the captains and coaches.
“But if people see some of the abuse that's happened to some of my colleagues over the last couple of weeks they'll be saying: ‘Really, is that what I want to give up my time for?'.
“So we've all got a role to play in upholding values, and I get people want to make a living for being controversial, but it doesn't help our game.”
Stream The Rugby Paper Podcast which will next week preview the Premiership Final on Apple, Spotify (also above), YouTube, or your favourite podcast provider.
For exclusive stories and all the detailed rugby news you need, subscribe to The Rugby Paper website, digital edition, or newspaper from as little as 14p a day.
